The End of The Line

Glory, hallelujah, the day has finally arrived.

After eight long years, we's finally gonna git rid of that foreign-born Muslim nigra-feller that's been livin' in OUR White House. Now we can finally git our guns back. (He did take 'em away, right, like ever'body said he would?) And we can go back to being kind and lovin' Christians like we used to be before that Obama guy started makin' us all wear those damn overgrown doo-rags and bowin' to whatever direction 10 times a day like he made us do. (He did make us do all that like ever'body on Fox News said he would, right?)

And now we can get that daggum stock market back up to eight or nine thousand where it belongs. (I ain't sure how all that works, but Mama says we can't retire early with the Dow Jones sittin' in the sixes like it was in 08 – whatever that means. 'Course now she tell me it's closin' in on 20,000 – been up high for a long time now! Ha! Who knew?)

At least I'm ready for them new Republicans to make that Affordable Care Act even better, like they said they would. Man, that thing sure saved Mama's ass! And while they're at it, now they can finally get rid of that Obamacare stuff, like they said they would.

Best of all, we can get more jobs in this country like Mr. Trump is talking about. Maybe even more than the 11 million that black guy added.

Oh, yeah … now we can start sending them illegals back to where's they belong and build that wall to keep 'em out! 'Course, Mama says that Obama deported more illegals than all the other presidents before him combined, but what does she know … she don't even LIKE Trump! Ha! What is there not to like?

Here's a guy with a sense of humor – hell, he mocks cripples! Don't we all?

Here's a guy with the smarts to know that Obama was a foreigner from day one – right?

Here's a guy who believes in war crimes. Hey, who doesn't?

He's judges women the way they oughtta be judged – for their looks! Don't you? And he's not afraid to take a situation like a hot babe into his own hands, if you know what I mean! Don't ya love it?

He knows that all them brown people from the Middle East and from Mexico are bad – hell, we can all agree on that, right?

So the sooner we git him in there and send 'ole Obama back to Kenya or Hawaii or Chicago or whichever one of them foreign places he's from, the better!

I'm with Trump on all of this stuff – and I guess if you voted for him, you are, too!

Right?

Riding the Trump Train

This week finds us at the halfway point between the day when this woeful nation elected Donald Trump to be the next President of the United States and the date next month when he is actually sworn in on Inauguration Day, aka, Doomsday. 

What has this clueless spitball given us so far, even before taking control?

- An already disturbing pattern of confusing his personal business practice with his presidential duties. (And you were worried about the Clinton's foundation? Ha!)

- A series of security breaches via unsecured phone calls to foreign leaders. (And you were worried about Hillary's emails? Ha, again!)

- The embracing of corporate cohorts for his cabinet. (And you were worried about Hillary's "Wall Street connections?" Hahaha!)

- An unprecedented breach of protocol with his call to Taiwan. (For you hardcore Trumpers, "unprecedented" means it had never happened before – and, arguably, should not have ever happened period.)

Let's have a look at some of those beauties Trump has picked for his administration ...

- Scott Pruitt – Environmental Protection Agency administrator – staunchly against any regulation.

- Andrew Puzder – Labor secretary – has an anti-labor record.

- Rex Tillerson – Secretary of state – has the connections to sell us out to Russia.

- Rick Perry – Energy Secretary – who once tried to promise in a debate in 2012 he would eliminate the Department of Energy – except he couldn't remember it.

- Ben Carson – HUD Secretary – who once proclaimed he wasn't qualified for any cabinet position (he was right), but thought he was qualified to be president. (He was wrong.)

- Tom Price – Secretary of Health and Human Services – like so many in D.C., an opponent of Obamacare; and like so many in D.C., has no alternative plan.

- Betsy DeVos – Secretary of the Department of Education – the woman charge with shaping up our public education system doesn't believe in public education.

- Nikki Haley – U.S. ambassador to the United Nations – oh, Lord, now we're in Palin territory.

- Jeff Sessions – Attorney general – your basic, run-of-the-mill racist.

- Steve Bannon – Chief strategist and counselor – enough said.

- Reince Priebus – Chief of staff – the smartest one of the bunch. This guy's career was OVER – until he jumped on the Trump train.

And let's not forget that Trump was actually considering David Petraeus for Secretary of State – IF Petraeus could get approval from his parole office to attend the interview.

Ah, yes … some bunch – your U.S. cabinet – choices made by the self-proclaimed Smartest Guy in the World …

- Smarter than the CIA. ("They're wrong about the Russians!")

- Smarter than the intelligence community. ("I don't need briefings; I've got a great brain!")

- Smarter than just about every theater attendee on the planet. ("Hamilton is overrated!")

Yep, we Americans – at least, an electoral plurality of us – think he's a smart guy. And why not? He's been on TeeeeeVeeeee! (How would you feel about Honey Boo Boo or Flavor Flav being the president?)

So here we stand, all of us on edge to discover what kind of president Trump will be; in essence, what kind of country WE'RE GOING TO BE. Because, he's going to pivot, right? Start acting presidential? HA! Dream on. I have news for you Trump voters waiting for the pivot: THIS IS IT.

Remember all those times Trump was going to pivot?

"When the primaries begin, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"If he gets the nomination, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"At the convention, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"Come Labor Day when the race REALLY starts, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"During the debates, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"If he's elected, he'll start acting Presidential." WRONG.

"Once he's in the White House, he'll start acting Presidential."

There will be no pivot. This is it. In five weeks this lunatic will possess the nuclear codes. And you can kiss your ass goodbye.

Totally Staged. Totally Trump.

Did Donald Trump really pick a Twitter fight with a theatrical troupe?

Did Mike Pence really walk into that place NOT thinking he'd be hassled in some way?

Does anyone actually think this little performance by the Trump team wasn't as staged as Kim Kardashian's "robbery" for the purpose of further perpetuating – as part of the overall Trump strategy – an "us against the world" scenario?

If Pence's attendance of the play "Hamilton" was as authentic as he'd like you to think it was, then YES – I do happen to believe that in what we have left of a decorous society, certain people warrant certain respect. But ours is not the America it once was; hell, it's not even the America of eight years ago. That went down the toilet the night that asshole from South Carolina, U.S. Representative Joe Wilson, yelled "you lie!" during an Obama State-of-the-Union address.

That little exclamation by Wilson was the spark that lit the Trump fire. The Donald recognized something that night – that the nation was ready for a vulgar, lying pied piper to take them down a path of insanity. And he succeeded. Yet in his messy wake float poor saps like Mike Pence, who would have been happy to stay under the radar in his home state of Indiana keeping his people happy with suggestions of Gay Conversion Therapy.

So … Mike Pence – the man who obviously hates outsiders – willingly attended a play centered on the idea that EVERYONE should have a chance at life, liberty and the pursuit of happiness. Right.

If you're naïve enough to believe that, then you probably voted for Trump.

Welcome to Trump Nation

What can America expect from President Donald Trump? Hold on to your ballot:

• The elimination of the Affordable Care Act. Those with pre-existing conditions (heart attack and stroke victims, those with cancer history, those with chronic ailments of any type such as migraines or back pain, may well never be able to obtain health insurance again. This has long been the goal of insurance companies; the abolition of the ACA will now make it a reality. If you think insurance rates are high now, just wait until the insurance companies – in cahoots with the Republican Party – begin operating unfettered.
• An expansion of gun rights. Trump likes money more than his own children and the NRA has lots of it – and they, too, have no regard for children.
• The elimination of a woman's right to make her own healthcare decisions – which is ironic since sexual abuse will, no doubt, increase under the Trump regime, given that this crime has his endorsement.
• Marriage equality will be eliminated as the Bible replaces the Constitution as the Law of the Land – in direct contrast to the will of the Founding Fathers.
• While Trump may not logistically be able to send 11 million Mexicans to Mexico or keep Muslims out, rampant and random physical and verbal abuse of these two groups of people will increase dramatically – encouraged and approved by the President of the United States.
• Pollution of all types we haven't seen since the early '70s will return. Any sort of regulation of industry will be history. You think businesses, in general, are good citizens? Think again – we live in a nation in which a law is needed to tell people not to litter.
• Prepare for the eradication of the First Amendment and the concept of a Free Press.
• Federally-funded "Gay Conversion" therapy will be instituted across the country – supervised personally by their creator and long-time advocate, Vice President Mike Pence. (How do you Republicans calling for the defunding of Planned Parenthood feel about this?)
• Drilling for oil in National Parks and other environmentally sacred lands will be initiated and supervised by Department of Energy Secretary Sarah Palin.
• The Department of Education will be eliminated as part of the continuing dumbing down of America.

Of course, this may all turn out to be moot given that under nuke-crazy Trump, this planet probably won't see the Summer of 2017. Remember: Trump's own people took away his Twitter account, yet think the nuclear codes are safe in his hands.

Amazing.